The Final Countdown:53 Days

You know it's the right thing to do. You know it's the only way. You know you will regret it if you don't. Yet you choose not to.

Maybe it's just the way we're programmed or maybe I'm just too lazy. I can't be the only one, to whom this happens. And everyday I watch myself sink deeper and deeper. Waiting for the 'unknown' to rescue me. Knowing it is just a fantasy.

When I am surrounded by people, all I want is to be alone. When I'm alone, all I want is be with someone. Don't get me wrong, being with other people and spending time is great. But sometimes, you need some time by yourself. To think. To organize your thoughts. To try and understand the world around you. Nevertheless, all of this come as a package. If you think too much, you come to some disturbing conclusions. If you spend the whole day by yourself. Alone in a big house with no one to talk to, you start talking to yourself. That's nothing to worry about, nearly everyone does it. But then there comes a time, when you start talking to people. People that are no there. 'Invisible friends' as some would called them. And it's only then that you realize: something is wrong.

But it's too late to go back.