So, How Was Your Day?: 6/5 Days

"Something about this relationship feels otherworldly to me, like it was designed by a power and a hand greater than my own"

Oprah Winfrey

Songs. Lyrics. And other peoples words. All so fascinating. If I had no common sense, I would probably just copy lyrics and passages to this blog all the time instead of writing my own shit. But I guess people don't want to read lyrics here. After all, this is supposed to be a place to free my mind, not share lyrics which people can get from anywhere. Sometime when I'm reading something, I don't see a reason for me to write anything ever again because everything I feel or think is already written. "Music is the great communicator" and maybe that's why I would probably go totally insane without it. In my English class there is this poster which says: "There is no book so bad, that there is no good in it". Well, sometimes that's how I feel about music. Ok, there is some songs which are so bad that they should be considered a crime against humanity. But majority of songs (even some shitty pop songs), have some sort of positive force of communication. It's like, when I switch on my mp3 player or my Windows Media Player, the invisible force, like a hand, comes out of the speakers or headphones and reaches for my heart. Then this invisible hand of power holds my heart, sometimes twisting it and making me angry and sometimes holding it tight to prevent it from breaking and making me cry.

The quotation at the beginning of this entry is from some stupid article in O magazine, made by Oprah Winfrey. That article was about how some people think she and Gayle King are in a sexually (gay) relationship. But away from that non sense, Oprah was trying so explain how strong her relationship is with Gayle. Apparently, they have been friends for over 30 years and have a 'four-times-a-day phone calls' relationship. I so don't care about them, but while reading it, I started thinking whether me and Julia will be this closer after 30 years. No one knows what will happened in the next 30 years. Well, apart from all that Global Warming shit and more wars. But excluding these not important subjects, in 30 years we might not even be alive. But if me and Julia are alive, the only way I see myself is with her beside me. And even if there is 3 kids on the other side of me or a bag of heroin, she will always be next to me. Because even when I try to imagine life without her for a slight second, it proves to be impossible. From here on, there are only two solutions to my life: the first is me with Julia, and the second is... well, the second is, me having no life at all. Few years back, me and Julia made a promise to each other: if one of us would die, the other would follow. I was thinking about that few days ago, and I think that promise needs an updating. If I died, there is no way I would want Julia to take her life. I much rather she fulfilled the dreams I failed to. I would want her to make all the fairy tales we made up come true. Beside, if I had a family or even children (that sound so funny), I would want her to take care of it.

There was something else I wanted to say, but I kind of forgot. [A very long pause]. Oh well, I can't remember. I am now trying to find a nice picture for this entry. [Another long pause]. Today, I told someone that I cried while watching Edward Scissorhands (yeah, I know. I even surprised myself when the tears come sprinting down my face), and then that person said that they never cried while watching a film. I don't really understand how could someone cry to a song but not to a movie. I consider myself to be a strong person when it comes to managing my emotions. But, come on! How cold do you have to be, to have never cried during a film? So I came to a conclusion: either this person have not watched enough movies, or he is completely cold. Both of which, I found extremely hard to believe.

This might possibly be my last entry before I fly away to the land of freedom. And a lot of under age drinking. And smoking while we're on that subject. I might write something before I go. That's if I don't get into one of those lazy phases which lasts for days. I might also write something during my holidays, which I really doubt. But you never know. Expect the unexpected, I say.